The Buddhist definition of true love, which to me sounds a lot like true friendship.
Maitri: Loving kindness; the ability to make someone happy. That “someone” can be:
Yourself
Someone you’re very fond of
Someone you have sympathy for (I forgot to mention that one)
A neutral person
An enemy; someone you perceive as the cause of your suffering
Mudita: transformation of pain
Karuna: joy
Upeksanam: equanimity, freedom, the opposite of imprisonment or forcing yourself on another person.
What I find interesting is what’s not on the list: passion, obsession, lust, obedience, dominance, jealousy…lots of things I’ve known people from all over the world define as true love (especially jealousy) but to me never seemed right.
And if you don’t believe it, that’s OK, because there is no dogma in Buddhism. There’s nothing that Buddha taught that you must believe or else be damned for all eternity. If it’s true for you, then it’s true.
From now on in my podcasts, I’m going to ramble, stutter, sniffle, repeat myself, etc. in homage to my new hero, Maria, the world’s most horrible singer.